>Subject: 33 ways to annoy someone

>1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
>2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage".
>3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
>4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public
consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."
>5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
>6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.
>7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
>8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
>9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food,
and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
>10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark,
17 inch paper, 99 copies.
>11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
>12. Sniffle incessantly.
>13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
>14. Name your dog "Dog".
>15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all
weather conditions "to keep them tuned up".
>16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
>17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of
your "astronaut training".
>18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your
neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
>19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it
was a "real hoot".
>20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they
touch with a can of Lysol.
>21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
>22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and copy them to your boss.
>23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
>24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if
people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
>25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell
the neighbors you are a "spider person".
>26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
>27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.
>28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences,
producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.
>29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
>30. Disassemble your pen and "accidently" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
>31. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.
>32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
>33. Send really long joke e-mails to all the people you know.